FFFFFFFF L U U SSSSSSSS H H F L U U S H H F L U U S H H FFFF L U U SSSSSSSS HHHHHHHHHH F L U U S H H F L U U S H H F L U U S H H F LLLLLLLLL UUUUUUUUUU SSSSSSSS H H W W IIIIIIIII TTTTTTTTT H H W W I T H H W W I T H H W W I T H H W W W I T HHHHHHHHHH W W W W I T H H W W W W I T H H W W W W I T H H W W IIIIIIIII T H H PPPPPPPP RRRRRRRR IIIIIIIII DDDDDDD EEEEEEEE P P R R I D D E P P R R I D D E P P R R I D D E PPPPPPPP RRRRRRRR I D D EEEE P R R I D D E P R R I D D E P R R I D D E P R R IIIIIIIII DDDDDDD EEEEEEEE MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MM$$$ $$$MM MM$$ $$MM MM$ $MM MM MM MM MM MM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MM MM MM MM MM MM MM T. CRAPPER AND CO. MM MM MM MM MM MM MM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MM MM MM MM MM MM$ $MM MM$$ $$MM MM$$$ $$$MM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM 8 : : 1 //1 : : 8 -:::- 1 //1 -:::- 8 : : 1 //1 : : 8 """ 1 //1 """ 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 ((!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)) 8 ((!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)) 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 1 //1 8 ((!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)) 8 ((!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)) """ 1 //1 " " 1 //1 " " 1 //1 """ 1 //1 " 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1 //1 1####1 .' //'. : //: : //: :--------------------------: //:--------------------------: : : : : : : : : : .'-------------------------------------------------'. : :--------------------------------------------------------------: :$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$: :--------------------------------------------------------------: : : :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: : : : : : : . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . : . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM M$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$M MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM THOMAS CRAPPER--------------UNSUNG HERO 1837 1919 BY DAVE KNEESHAW THOMAS CRAPPER, THE PLUMMERS MENTOR AND HIS VALVELESS WATER WASTE PREVENTER; BOON TO MANKIND, PAST AND PRESENT; HAS MADE OUR LIVING, FAR MORE PLEASANT. BORN IN EIGHTEEN-THIRTY - SEVEN; APRENTICE PLUMMER AT AGE ELEVEN. BLESSINGS ON HIS BIRTHPLACE, THORNE, IN MERRY ENGLAND, WHERE HE WAS BORNE. AN UNSUNG HERO, ALAS ! FORSOOTH ! HE PERFECTED THE FLUSHER, AND THAT'S THE TRUTH. TRULY AN ARTIST IN EVERY SENSE; HIS CONTRIBUTION WAS MOST IMMENSE. BY HIS MERGER OF CHINA, AND PIPE, AND GROUT, THE WONDEROUS BIFFY WAS BROUGHT ABOUT. MORE THAN A THRONE OF HUMBLE DUTY; CRAPPER MADE IT A THING OF BEAUTY. ENSCONCED WITH DESIGN OF VARIOUS HUE; A TRULY REMARKABLE THING TO VIEW. NO MORE TRIPS TO THE SHED, OUTSIDE; HOUSED INDOORS WITH POMP AND PRIDE. NO MORE CLATTER BENEATH THE BED; ENSHRINED IN ITS OWN LITTLE ROOM INSTEAD. NO LONGER A VESSEL OF VAST DISDAIN; A MARVELOUS CHAMBER OF CHINA AND CHAIN. MY FRIENDS, WE'VE COME A LONG, LONG WAY; THE OUTDOOR PRIVY IS GONE TO STAY. BUT, ALAS; POOR CRAPPER HAS LONG SINCE DIED. SO, SHED A TEAR, AND FLUSH WITH PRIDE. WB7OKG